The Harding Law Firm News

A Pre-Wedding Discussion Checklist

Harding Law Firm - Tuesday, August 25, 2015

—Tips from a Matrimonial Attorney

While details regarding your wedding day are the biggest topic for discussion, it is important that you and your fiancé discuss more important, long-term matters. From finances to kids, you can avoid future marital disputes just by having these in-depth, potentially difficult conversations before you say “I Do.”

5 Things to Discuss Before the Marriage

Before getting married, schedule a time to sit down with your spouse and discuss five very important topics. These topics are often what can result in a divorce later on and they happen because couples fail to talk about the details ahead of time.

  1. Kids – Couples need to discuss how they feel about children, but the conversation should not just be whether or not they want kids. The conversation should go in-depth as to how many kids or whether or not you are open to adoption if natural conception does not work.
  2. Money and Career – You do not want to disagree later about finances or whether one individual needs to sacrifice their career for the other spouse. You both need to sit down and discuss where you see your finances in the future, where you plan to take your careers, etc. For example, if one of you is attending school, will that be doable once you are married and/or have children?
  3. Religion or Values – Religion and/or values become a heated debate later in marriage. You both should discuss your feelings toward religion and how your values will play a role in raising children in the future.
  4. Fights – Having a game plan for how you will handle marital disputes in the future is important. You should understand each other’s way of managing conflicts. While conflicts will happen in a marriage, understanding one another’s approach to those conflicts and having a way to work it out can relieve tension in the marriage.
  5. Deal Breakers – There are certain things a person cannot handle in the marriage and those should be brought up before it is official. You should be open with your partner about what you can handle. For example, if your spouse refuses to manage their money or wants to engage in a party lifestyle instead of settling down, that may be something you will not tolerate. Having your deal breakers hashed out ahead of time can prevent you from encountering a divorce later when a deal breaker pops up unexpectedly.

While these conversations are not as exciting as making plans for your wedding or honeymoon, they can help you and your spouse get off on the right foot for your marriage.

Speak with a divorce attorney if you need assistance with your divorce or separation agreement. Contact Charles Harding for a free consultation online or call 518-384-3400